For some people, Christmas is not a fun time. For others, it’s completely amazing.
December is my favourite time of the year. I actually enjoy the lead up to Christmas more than the actual day because it’s over so quickly. In saying that, the most favourite part of the whole thing for me, besides Jesus, is watching our family open their gifts from us. I think I am more excited than them. The thrill of watching their faces brings such joy to my heart. Even our older sons who say they aren’t as thrilled with Christmas anymore find it hard to contain their smiles when they open their gifts and enjoy the full English dinner complete with Yorkshire Pudding and gravy set before them. Yum!
I don’t know about you, but Christmas can be very stressful for me. A couple of years ago, after the festivities ended, I decided to sit down and ask the Lord why I was so stressed. It all boiled down to one thing.
Drumroll, please …….
I NEEDED TO RELEASE MYSELF AND OTHERS
FROM MY EXPECTATIONS
It may seem simple but I had not realised the ridiculously high expectations I had put upon myself.
As a child, my favourite part of Christmas Day was eating my mother’s baked dinner (no-one makes baked potatoes like my mum) and then going to my grandmother’s house and meeting up with all of my aunties, uncles and cousins. My grandmother was one of the most beautiful women on the entire earth and I aspire to be like her. My relatives descended upon her house at Christmas time from all parts of Australia. She had 8 children so hence there were a lot of cousins. Just being with everyone was the highlight of my year.
I longed for this for my own family yet I have since come to terms with the fact that not everyone is like me …. and that’s totally ok. My expectations were not anyone else’s so I was putting unnecessary and unwanted pressure on others as well as myself and that does not make for a happy time.
What are your Christmases like? Do you enjoy being with family and friends or is it a source of pain, sorrow and bad memories? I am sorry if it is the latter.
If you are like me and long for the big happy family but it just doesn’t seem to get there, may I suggest you be a little easier on yourself, relax, and see what you can do to make the day less stressful for yourself.
What is in your own control?
To be honest, the only thing that you are in control of …. IS YOU.
You are not in control of the weather. You are not in control of other people’s feelings, words or actions on the day. You are not in control of who joins in the festivities or who doesn’t bother to show up. You are not even in control (a lot of the time) of the gifts you receive.
But ….
…. you are in control of you. You are in control of whether you will react or respond to situations and people during the day. You are in control of whether you venture out or not. You are even in control of whether or not you go to church or not on Christmas Day. What? No, God will not be upset with you if you don’t go. Relax. Don’t add that pressure to your day if you are trying to fit too much in. In saying that, I do love going to church on Christmas Day but to be honest, when the children were very little, we didn’t go. It was just too much – and that was ok.
TIPS FOR KEEPING YOUR PEACE
If you are not organised, take note and plan earlier next year.
If you don’t enjoy organising enlist a friend or family member who does. I am sure they would love to help. There are plenty of free Christmas Day organising lists on the internet. After this Christmas ends, think about how you could begin getting organised much sooner next year.
Release your expectations of others.
Let those expectations go. You will feel such freedom when you do this. Just let your family and friends be who they are and accept who they are, no matter how annoying or frustrating they can be.
Release your unrealistic expectations of yourself.
Decide today, right now, that you will enjoy Christmas Day or even just a part of it if it brings you pain. You can only do what you can do and it’s ok to not have a picture perfect day. Beautiful memories can be created without the magazine look, without all the gifts, without an overflowing banquet and even with absent family and friends. Christmas Day is what you make of it.
Take time to be thankful.
Take 2 minutes before the festivities begin to think of as many things as you can to be thankful for. Did you sleep in a bed? Do you have running, warm water in your shower? Will you have breakfast today? There are just so many things to be thankful for, even if times are hard. If it is hard to think of anything, one undeniable fact is JESUS LOVES YOU! For this you can truly be thankful.
Delegate.
For me, this is a hard one but I am getting better at it. It’s ok to not do everything yourself. If you are having people over, ask different members to bring a plate of food and/or a drink to share. Ask people beforehand if they would mind staying and cleaning up. Remember that the whole day is not just up to you.
Remember Jesus.
After all, it is His birthday that we are celebrating.
He is the Prince of Peace.
“Peace I leave with you; My [perfect] peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid. [Let My perfect peace calm you in every circumstance and give you courage and strength for every challenge.]”. John 14:27 (AMP)
Interestingly, it says, “Do not let your heart be troubled.” In other words, you have a choice in whether or not your heart becomes troubled. How do you choose not to? By deciding beforehand that you will receive and keep Jesus’ peace no matter what happens. I am not there yet but I am practising this. Maybe you could too, starting today!
No matter what type of Christmas you will have, I pray with all my heart that you will know your Heavenly Father’s love in a deeper and more intimate way. He is always for you and He loves you fiercely.
How are you celebrating Christmas this year? What family traditions do you have? What is your favourite part of Christmas? What is your favourite food? Please share in the comments below as I would love to hear some of your favourite things and traditions. Maybe you could share a humorous Christmas story that you have.
However you spend the day and whatever you are doing in the lead-up, I pray that peace will reign in your hearts and that you will intimately know the Prince of Peace Himself.
Many blessings to you,
(Photo Credit: www.pexels.com)
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